He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize