then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
