I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize