so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize