so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
