I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
