You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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