Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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