Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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