is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
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