New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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