I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
how drunk are you?
Several
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
