Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I'm both gender and math confused
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
