It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
