New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Randomize