Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
