Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
