This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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