i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
