I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
