i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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