Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
