even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
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Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
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As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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