Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
