he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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