it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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