it's too hot outside to masturbate.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
