How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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