Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Randomize
