Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
