If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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