i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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