This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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