If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize