The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
