I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
