There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
