She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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