he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
