24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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