if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
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