dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
