Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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