Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
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