This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
