she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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