This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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