My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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