is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
and you said cock pushups were impossible
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Randomize
