a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
please come you make the beer taste better
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Randomize