There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
